3 Tips to Identify your Friend Confidant

Here are 3 Tips to Identify Your Confidants:

Trust Me – You Need This

We’re starting with an obvious question:

Can you trust them?

You’ll likely already have an idea of someone that you can confide in or you would like to become your confidant.

I encourage you to ask yourself:

Can I trust them?

You’ll only get the true value of having a confidant if you’re comfortable being vulnerable with them.

You won’t need to share your deepest, darkest secrets with them, but you do need to be able to share whatever you’re hoping to confide in them.

For example, I speak with Pejman Milaniand Hannah Wilson on an almost-daily basis, and I am comfortable speaking with them about the pitfalls of social media.

I’ve been able to confide in them transparently when I’ve been chasing the dopamine high of more likes and followers.

And I’ve been comfortable sharing my experience with them when facing the challenges of freelancing.

They’ve also seen me at my worst as I have wrestled with getting the balance right of pursuing my purpose while not neglecting revenue.

Without being able to share these things, I would’ve been trying to traverse this journey on my own.

But because they are both trustworthy, I’ve been able to invite them in to help me avoid that pitfalls and stay on the right path.

If you want to get the full value out of having confidants, you need to identify someone that you can truly trust.

🤨 “What Do You Mean?”

The second tip to identify a suitable confidant is finding someone who understands what you are talking about.

There’s nothing worse than having a confidant that constantly asks: 

“What do you mean?”

You’ll likely find the experience of having someone that you can confide in more infuriating than rewarding if you’re constantly having to explain what you’re going through.

Save yourself this frustration and find someone who has some understanding of the journey you’re on.

It doesn’t have to be that they’ve walked the same journey that you’re walking in its entirety, but they have to be aware of the rough area.

Going back to my example with PJ and Hannah, they’re both content creating and building online, but they’re doing it for different reasons and in different circumstances.

I’d like to think that I’m able to support Hannah and speak into her creative journey, but I’m not doing this full-time. I can’t exactly relate to the challenges she faces as a full-time visual creator.

Similarly, I support PJ on his creative journey, but I don’t know what it’s like to run live cohorts of a visual course whilst juggling parenthood and a full-time job! 

And they both speak immense value into my journey, though they don’t have the same mission of wanting to encourage people get wiser like I do.

But we all have a mutual understandingof visual communication, personal development and creating online.

If you’re looking to find confidants, identify people that have a sufficient understanding of what you’re looking to confide in.

Bakers Don’t Sell Smoothies

This is an unusual analogy, but stick with me – all will become clear.

Take a moment to imagine:

You’re looking to get into shape. 

You’ve been enjoying too many of the pastries and doughnuts from the local bakery, and so you decide that you need to lose some weight.

You’ve heard lots of great things about dieting, and in particular how smoothies are a great way to help get your 5-a-day.

So you head to your closest bakery, and ask for a banana and strawberry smoothie.

“We don’t do those. We only do baked goods.”

You probably should have known that. After all, you’ve never seen this bakery sell smoothies before, so why would you expect them to start doing smoothies just because you’re now interested in them?

Now you have a couple options:

• Either you go back to the bakery again at your next earliest opportunity and ask for another smoothie
• Or you opt to look elsewhere to find what you’re looking for

Obviously we’re not actually talking about diets, smoothies and bakeries here. 

What I’m trying to get at is that some people won’t be able to offer you what you’re looking for in a confidant.

They either won’t have the capacity or competency to help you in the way that you desire.

In these instances, look elsewhere.

You are much more likely to find your suitable confidant elsewhere than convince this person to step into the role you need them to fill.

These people may be able to grow and evolve into what you need in a confidant, but if there’s no indication from them that they’ll try to fill those expectations, don’t try to force it.

It’s tricky to convince your local bakery to start stocking smoothies.

To make it abundantly clear: I’m not suggesting that you cut these people from your life entirely.

Instead, I’m suggesting that you maintain whatever relationship you have with that person, and identify someone else to fulfils your needs for a confidant.

Ultimately you need to identify a confidant who is not only capable of being your confidant, but also identify someone who is willing to be your confidant.

Source: Wisdom Made Easy posted at Wiser Newsletter

How to be happy without trying so hard

By Dominica as posted in Daily Motivation

Most people want to feel happier emotions far more often than sad ones.

We want to feel happy and content and because of this, we do all sorts of things to try to experience such feelings. We tend to think if we work harder, make more money, read more books, have more friends, do more things, etc., that we’ll just feel happier.

It’s common to want to feel good and have our desires and dreams manifest. We want to feel and experience abundance. However, a problem arises when we don’t really know how to get from where we are, such as sad, frustrated, or miserable, to a state of happiness.

Here’s a little secret: It’s not as difficult as you think. 

The Law of Attraction: Like Attracts Like

Feeling happy and content consistently is not the monstrous job we make it out to be. It may be so simple that we miss it.

Listen to this quote by Joe Vitale:

“It’s really important that you feel good. Because this feeling good is what goes out as a signal into the universe and starts to attract more of itself to you. So the more you can feel good, the more you will attract the things that help you feel good and that will keep bringing you up higher and higher.

This sums up the law of attraction quite well.

The law of attraction has gotten pretty popular over recent years. The reason is because when people learn how to use the law to create a life they love, their life changes significantly for the better. The movie and book, The Secret, opened the eyes of millions of people to the power of thought and the law of attraction.

Basically, the law of attraction asserts that like attracts like.

It means that what you put your focus or energy on, you get more of the same. The thoughts you think act like a magnet and are attracting things to you all the time.  

You see, your thoughts affect your feelings, and your feelings affect your actions. If you are feeling terrible, chances are that your thoughts are predominantly negative. As a result of your negative thoughts and feelings, your actions will tend to be negative as well.

Feel Happier: Stop With the Negative Thoughts

For example, if you tend to think a lot about how unfair it was that your mom and dad divorced and you carry some resentment about it, you will wrestle with negative feelings like anger, depression, resentment, bitterness, and so on.  

Those negative feelings may cause you to be more apt to reach for substances that temporarily dull the pain, like alcohol or drugs. Or you may choose friends who are miserable or mean. Your thoughts influence your feelings and your feelings influence your behavior.

Should you understand these principles, then you can stop negativity and negative feelings from ruling your life.  

Now, I’m not saying you’ll never feel negative feelings, because you will. And, that’s alright. But we don’t have to stay stuck in these emotions long-term.

If you struggle with negative emotions or you simply want to have more control over your emotions, consider learning more about the law of attraction.

Everything is Energy

At the very core, everything in the world is energy, including your thoughts.  

If you know anything about energy, you understand that energy has certain vibrations known as frequencies. There are low frequencies and there are high frequencies and matter can fall in between on the scale. For example, negative thoughts and feelings have a lower frequency than positive thoughts. 

Have you ever heard people talk about the vibes of a person?  

They might say “He has great vibes,” or “Her vibes rub me the wrong way.” We are all emitting a frequency and our goal ought to be to emit higher frequencies. To raise your frequency, it is important to understand the law of attraction philosophy.

3 Ways to Raise Your Vibration and Feel Happier

1. Feel Abundant And Happy Now

If you want to feel good, it is important to raise your vibration to a higher level.  

How do you do that? 

This might sound so simple, but you simply have to FEEL GOOD in order to raise your vibration. 

Most people think it’s the other way around. They think that in order to experience positive emotions, certain things have to fall in place. They must get the promotion, the beautiful partner, the bonus, the new car, etc. in order to feel good, but it’s the opposite:

You must feel good first and THEN the good things come.

2. Monitor Your Thoughts Because They Lead to Feelings

It is so important to tend to your thoughts. If you are thinking negative thoughts, you are going to experience negative feelings, and therefore you will not feel that great. Although if you force yourself to think positively and feel good NOW, you will feel better!  

Not only will you feel good, but you will be attracting all sorts of positive things into your life.

3. Don’t Worry, Be Happy

Remember the catchy song “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”? The lyrics go:

“In every life we have some trouble.

When you worry you make it double

Don’t worry, be happy

Don’t worry, be happy now.”

Seems like Bobby McFerrin, the writer of this song, understood a bit about the dynamics of the law of attraction, as he is quite right when he says, “When you worry you make it double.”

Your feelings now are what matter. Your feelings now dictate what is in your future. As tempting as it is to stay sad, angry, or frustrated, try not to. If you do, you may be attracting more of that into your life. 

Start to Feel Happier Now 

Feel happy now. Sing a song. Dance to some good music. Laugh out loud. Pet your cat.

Do what makes you feel happier, and this is very likely to bring your mood up and you’ll feel happier.

To know everything, what is that to you?

John 21:20-25 NRSVue 

²⁰Peter turned and saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following them; he was the one who had reclined next to Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is it that is going to betray you?” ²¹When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “Lord, what about him?” ²²Jesus said to him, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? Follow me!” ²³So the rumor spread among the brothers and sisters that this disciple would not die. Yet Jesus did not say to him that he would not die, but, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you?”^,

²⁴This is the disciple who is testifying to these things and has written them, and we know that his testimony is true. ²⁵But there are also many other things that Jesus did; if every one of them were written down, I suppose that the world itself could not contain the books that would be written.

New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition (NRSVUE)

“Copyright © 2021 National Council of Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.”

Some thoughts on this scripture

Each bible has a blank page at the end. This is for each of us to write our own gospel! We can note the incidents, relationships, bad times and good in our lives where Jesus was close, active, saving us, calling us and challenging us into discipleship. Can you note where and when your life with Jesus begin? Like John, we don’t know where it will end. Where is Jesus now writing his gospel in your life so that others will know is love, his call and his identity? Some good pointers for prayer!

Even as John concludes his gospel, he is aware that the words of Jesus may be misunderstood. I pray that I may be preserved from any misinterpretation of Jesus’ words as I take this time in prayer, asking God to speak directly to my heart.John had a sense that the works of Jesus were many, and that numerous books might be written. Before God, I consider the works of Jesus in my life, giving thanks for the hidden and evident ways in which I have come to life. I think of myself as a ‘gospel’, a testament to God’s loving presence and action.

Source: Sacred Space

Do you love me?

¹⁵When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my lambs.” ¹⁶A second time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Tend my sheep.” ¹⁷He said to him the third time, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter felt hurt because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” And he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. ¹⁸Very truly, I tell you, when you were younger, you used to fasten your own belt and to go wherever you wished. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will fasten a belt around you and take you where you do not wish to go.” ¹⁹(He said this to indicate the kind of death by which he would glorify God.) After this he said to him, “Follow me.” – John 21:15-19

Reflection:

Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves Him. Three times confirming his love and devotion, which balances out the three times he denied Jesus. In a way, this can symbolize confession. Peter tells Jesus he loves Him three times, one “I love you” for each denial of Jesus, which becomes an act of contrition. After each “I love you,” Jesus gives Peter the task of leading His Church. This Gospel shows the power of forgiveness and just how involved God wants us to be in His church even when we make mistakes.

Throughout this scene, Peter is getting distressed because Jesus keeps asking him if he loves Him, to which Peter replies,

“Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” John 21:17

This response is something to consider. God does know everything. But does that mean we shouldn’t praise and worship Him? Does that mean we shouldn’t go to confession and ask for forgiveness?

This can also apply to our loved ones. You might believe that they know you love them, but how often do you tell them?

We can also apply this to parenthood. Do your kids ever ask you the same question repeatedly? During these moments that test our patience, we can think of Jesus saying,

“Feed my lambs.” John 21:15

We are fulfilling God’s role by taking care of our children, which can sometimes look like answering the same question and practicing patience with them. I, for one, am guilty of getting distressed like Peter at hearing the same question multiple times. This is where we need to choose to love. We “tend [Christ’s] sheep” (John 21:16) when we choose to love others and guide them to God. That is what Jesus was asking of Peter. And it is what He asks of us too.

Ponder:

When is the last time you told God that you loved Him?

Pray:

Thank You for being an all-loving and forgiving Father. Help me to guide my own family closer to You.

Source: Catholic Mom

Dynamic Leadership: Embrace Continuous Growth

“Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.” – John F. Kennedy

Leadership is not a static achievement but a dynamic journey. In the fast-paced, ever-evolving world of business and society, resting on past accomplishments is a recipe for obsolescence. As a leadership and motivational expert, I emphasize that continual personal and professional development is crucial. It’s not just about acquiring new skills; it’s about fostering a mindset of perpetual growth and adaptability. Leaders who cease to evolve risk not only their own stagnation but also the vitality of their organizations.

Read curated article in full

Performance management that puts people first

Performance management systems help people continuously develop—but most companies fall short of best practices. A set of defined design choices can help guide leaders forward.

Read the curated article in full

True Unity in Mind and Heart

Jesus is the Standard for Love – John 17:20-26

If we were all suddenly a little younger and had a passion for basketball, for example, we might look to Michael Jordan, Stephen Curry, or one of the great female basketball stars in order to see how the game should be played. An aspiring writer might read Shakespeare or Hemmingway in order to see how writing should be done. If we want to know how to love, we look to Jesus who is the standard for love. Our focus on that standard brings us together in unity.

In his book, “the pursuit of God,” AW Tozer said this: “Has it ever occurred to you that one hundred pianos all tuned to the same fork are automatically tuned to each other? They are of one accord by being tuned, not to each other, but to the standard to which each one must individually must bow. So, one hundred worshipers (meeting) together, each one looking to Christ, are in heart, nearer to each other than they could possibly be, were they to come in “unity” focused not on God, but on trying to work things out on their own between each other.”

Today we hear the conclusion of Jesus’ prayer at his last meal with the disciples. Jesus prays not only for the disciples, but for those as he says “who will believe in me through their word.” In other words, he prays for us.

The prayer underlines the importance of remaining united to one another in Christ. Only if Christians remain united in Christ, will evangelization be fruitful and enable others to come to believe.

It’s interesting to look at the various commentaries that are available that discuss this Gospel, as it relates to Christ’s plea for unity. Some see it as a call to unify under the mantle of the Catholic Church. Others see it as a kind of charter for the ecumenical movement- bringing together Christians across all denominations.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says that “Christ bestowed unity on his Church from the beginning”, and that unity “subsists in the Catholic Church”. This vision of unity comes from accepting that Christ is head and that he chose to lead us through Saint Peter and all the popes and bishops who came from his line of ordination. Disunity, in their minds comes from the fraying from the Magisterium and its protection and explanations put forth of the teachings of Christ.
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The ecumenist sees this gospel as mandate for breaking down the divisions which set one group of people against another. They point to St Paul speaking to the Galatians when he says that in Christ there is “no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male and female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus.”

Both views are valid, but no matter from which lens we view this gospel, the tone of this prayer from the Son to the Father on the night before his death makes it clear that the avenue to get to unity is simply through Christ’s love. As the Father and Jesus love each other, so does Jesus love his disciples, and so must his disciples love each other.

Only if the disciples, and all of us, remain in God’s love, will we be able to see Jesus’ glory, the glory that he has with the Father. And, it would be natural to project forward that this prayer focused on unity driven through love, is one that Jesus makes to this day in intercession for each of us on our behalf.

Jesus prays for us to come together as one. In fact, he sees us as one already. When Jesus looks at Christians, he does not see us as isolated individuals. He recognizes us as persons, certainly, but as persons in community with one another. He does not see us as apart from each other. His vision is that we are one. If Jesus sees us that way, the implication here is that we should see ourselves the same way.

So, let us contemplate today the Father’s love for the Son, and the Son’s love for the Father, and know that the love they have for each of us can neither be taken away or enhanced because it is love at its fullest. And let us use Christ’s words today to remind us of the pleasure that he undoubtedly gets from our efforts to find common ground, to gather, to unite and to express our love for him through each other. The answer to Christ’s prayer… is us… whenever we ourselves humbly love one another.

So, let us pray for more unity in our families, in our parish, in our local community, in our country, and in our world. Let’s extend the prayer that Jesus offers to the Father, that the world may come to know that the Father loves all of us just as he loved his only Son.

Source: Our Lady of Mount Carmel Parish

Is Tongues evidence that the Holy Spirit is in you?

There are three occasions in the book of Acts where speaking in tongues accompanied the receiving of the Holy Spirit—Acts 2:4, 10:44-46, and 19:6. However, these three occasions are the only places in the Bible where speaking in tongues is an evidence of receiving the Holy Spirit. Throughout the book of Acts, thousands of people believe in Jesus and nothing is said about them speaking in tongues (Acts 2:41, 8:5-25, 16:31-34, 21:20). Nowhere in the New Testament is it taught that speaking in tongues is the only evidence that a person has received the Holy Spirit. In fact, the New Testament teaches the opposite. We are told that every believer in Christ has the Holy Spirit (Romans 8:9; 1 Corinthians 12:13; Ephesians 1:13-14), but not every believer speaks in tongues (1 Corinthians 12:29-31).

So, why was speaking in tongues the evidence of the Holy Spirit in those three passages in Acts? Acts 2records the apostles being baptized in the Holy Spirit and empowered by Him to proclaim the gospel. The apostles were enabled to speak in other languages (tongues) so they could share the truth with people in their own languages. Acts 10 records the apostle Peter being sent to share the gospel with non-Jewish people. Peter and the other early Christians, being Jews, would have a hard time accepting Gentiles (non-Jewish people) into the church. God enabled the Gentiles to speak in tongues to demonstrate that they had received the same Holy Spirit the apostles had received (Acts 10:47, 11:17).

Acts 10:44-47 describes this: “While Peter was still speaking these words, the Holy Spirit came on all who heard the message. The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles. For they heard them speaking in tongues and praising God. Then Peter said, ‘Can anyone keep these people from being baptized with water? They have received the Holy Spirit just as we have.’“ Peter later refers back to this occasion as proof that God was indeed saving the Gentiles (Acts 15:7-11).

Speaking in tongues is nowhere presented as something all of us should expect when we decided to have personal and deep relationship with Jesus Christ as our Savior and are therefore baptized in the Holy Spirit. In fact, out of all the conversion accounts in the New Testament, only two record speaking in tongues in that context. Tongues was a miraculous gift that had a specific purpose for a specific time. It was not, and never has been, the only evidence of receiving the Holy Spirit.

Praying in Tongues

As a background, please read gift of speaking in tongues. There are four primary Scripture passages that are cited as evidence for praying in tongues: Romans 8:26; 1 Corinthians 14:4-17; Ephesians 6:18; and Jude verse 20. Ephesians 6:18 and Jude 20 mention “praying in the Spirit.” However, tongues as a prayer language is not a likely interpretation of “praying in the Spirit.”

Romans 8:26 teaches us, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” Two key points make it highly unlikely that Romans 8:26 is referring to tongues as a prayer language. First, Romans 8:26 states that it is the Spirit who “groans,” not believers. Second, Romans 8:26 states that the “groans” of the Spirit “cannot be expressed.” The very essence of speaking in tongues is uttering words.

That leaves us with 1 Corinthians 14:4-17 and verse 14 especially: “For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit prays, but my mind is unfruitful.” First Corinthians 14:14 distinctly mentions “praying in tongues.” What does this mean? First, studying the context is immensely valuable. First Corinthians chapter 14 is primarily a comparison/contrast of the gift of speaking in tongues and the gift of prophecy. Verses 2-5 make it clear that Paul views prophecy as a gift superior to tongues. At the same time, Paul exclaims the value of tongues and declares that he is glad that he speaks in tongues more than anyone (verse 18).

Acts chapter 2 describes the first occurrence of the gift of tongues. On the day of Pentecost, the apostles spoke in tongues. Acts chapter 2 makes it clear that the apostles were speaking in a human language (Acts 2:6-8). The word translated “tongues” in both Acts chapter 2 and 1 Corinthians chapter 14 is glossa which means “language.” It is the word from which we get our modern English word “glossary.” Speaking in tongues was the ability to speak in a language the speaker does not know, in order to communicate the gospel to someone who does speak that language. In the multicultural area of Corinth, it seems that the gift of tongues was especially valuable and prominent. The Corinthian believers were able to better communicate the gospel and God’s Word as a result of the gift of tongues. However, Paul made it abundantly clear that even in this usage of tongues, it was to be interpreted or “translated” (1 Corinthians 14:13, 27). A Corinthian believer would speak in tongues, proclaiming God’s truth to someone who spoke that language, and then that believer, or another believer in the church, was to interpret what was spoken so that the entire assembly could understand what was said.

What, then, is praying in tongues, and how is it different than speaking in tongues? First Corinthians 14:13-17 indicates that praying in tongues is also to be interpreted. As a result, it seems that praying in tongues was offering a prayer to God. This prayer would minister to someone who spoke that language, but would also need to be interpreted so that the entire body could be edified.

This interpretation does not agree with those who view praying in tongues as a prayer language. This alternate understanding can be summarized as follows: praying in tongues is a personal prayer language between a believer and God (1 Corinthians 13:1) that a believer uses to edify himself (1 Corinthians 14:4). This interpretation may be in error for the following reasons: 1) How could praying in tongues be a private prayer language if it is to be interpreted (1 Corinthians 14:13-17)? 2) How could praying in tongues be for self-edification when Scripture says that the spiritual gifts are for the edification of the church, not the self (1 Corinthians 12:7)? 3) How can praying in tongues be a private prayer language if the gift of tongues is a “sign to unbelievers” (1 Corinthians 14:22)? 4) The Bible makes it clear that not everyone possesses the gift of tongues (1 Corinthians 12:11, 28-30). How could tongues be a gift for self-edification if not every believer can possess it? Do we not all need to be edified?

Some understand praying in tongues to be a “secret code language” that prevents Satan and his demons from understanding our prayers and thereby gaining an advantage over us. This interpretation may not be true for the following reasons: 1) The New Testament consistently describes tongues as a human language, and Satan and his demons are well able to understand human languages. 2) The Bible records countless believers praying in their own language, out loud, with no concern of Satan intercepting the prayer. Even if Satan and/or his demons hear and understand the prayers we pray, they have absolutely no power to prevent God from answering the prayers according to His will. We know that God hears our prayers, and that fact makes it irrelevant whether Satan and his demons hear and understand our prayers.

What do we say, then, about the many Christians who have experienced praying in tongues and find it to be very personally edifying? First, we must base our faith and practice on Scripture, not experience. We must view our experiences in light of Scripture, not interpret Scripture in light of our experiences. Second, many of the cults and world religions also report occurrences of speaking in tongues/praying in tongues. Obviously the Holy Spirit is not gifting these unbelieving individuals. So, it seems that the demons are able to counterfeit the gift of speaking in tongues. This should cause us to compare even more carefully our experiences with Scripture. Third, studies have shown how speaking/praying in tongues can be a learned behavior. Through hearing and observing others speak in tongues, a person can learn the procedure, even subconsciously. This is the most likely explanation for the vast majority of instances of speaking/praying in tongues among us. Fourth, the feeling of “self-edification” is natural. The human body produces adrenaline and endorphins when it experiences something new, exciting, emotional, and/or disconnected from rational thought.

Praying in tongues is most definitely an issue on which we can respectfully and lovingly agree to disagree. Praying in tongues is not what determines salvation. Praying in tongues is not what separates a mature Christian from an immature Christian. Whether or not there is such a thing as praying in tongues as a personal prayer language is not a fundamental of the Christian faith. So, while we believe the biblical interpretation of praying in tongues leads away from the idea of a private prayer language for personal edification, we also recognize that many who practice such are our brothers and sisters in Christ and are worthy of our love and respect.

Author Anonynous & Unknown

Speaking in Tongues

The first occurrence of speaking in tongues occurred on the day of Pentecost in Acts 2:1–4. The apostles shared the gospel with the crowds, speaking to them in their own languages. The crowds were amazed: “We hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!” (Acts 2:11). The Greek word translated “tongues” literally means “languages.” Therefore, the gift of tongues is speaking in a language the speaker has never learned in order to minister to someone who does speak that language. In 1 Corinthians12—14, Paul discusses miraculous gifts, saying, “Now, brothers, if I come to you and speak in tongues, what good will I be to you, unless I bring you some revelation or knowledge or prophecy or word of instruction?” (1 Corinthians 14:6). According to the apostle Paul, and in agreement with the tongues described in Acts, speaking in tongues is valuable to the one hearing God’s message in his or her own language, but it is useless to everyone else unless it is interpreted/translated.

A person with the gift of interpreting tongues(1 Corinthians 12:30) could understand what a tongues-speaker was saying even though he did not know the language being spoken. The tongues interpreter would then communicate the message of the tongues speaker to everyone else, so all could understand. “For this reason anyone who speaks in a tongue should pray that he may interpret what he says” (1 Corinthians 14:13). Paul’s conclusion regarding tongues that were not interpreted is powerful: “But in the church I would rather speak five intelligible words to instruct others than ten thousand words in a tongue” (1 Corinthians 14:19).

Is the gift of tongues for today? First Corinthians 13:8mentions the gift of tongues ceasing, although it connects the ceasing with the arrival of the “perfect” in 1 Corinthians 13:10. Some point to a difference in the tense of the Greek verbs referring to prophecy and knowledge “ceasing” and that of tongues “being ceased” as evidence for tongues ceasing before the arrival of the “perfect.” While a possible interpretation, this is not explicitly clear from the text. Some also point to passages such as Isaiah 28:11 and Joel 2:28–29 as evidence that speaking in tongues was a sign of God’s oncoming judgment. First Corinthians 14:22 describes tongues as a “sign to unbelievers.” Using this verse, cessationists argue that the gift of tongues was a warning to the Jews that God was going to judge Israel for rejecting Jesus Christ as Messiah. Therefore, when God did in fact judge Israel (with the destruction of Jerusalem by the Romans in AD 70), the gift of tongues no longer served its intended purpose. This view is also possible, but the primary purpose of tongues being fulfilled does not necessarily demand the gift’s cessation. Scripture does not conclusively assert that the gift of speaking in tongues has ceased.

At the same time, if the gift of speaking in tongues were active in the church today, it would be performed in agreement with Scripture. It would be a real and intelligible language (1 Corinthians 14:10). It would be for the purpose of communicating God’s Word with a person of another language (Acts 2:6–12). It would be exercised in the church in agreement with the command God gave through Paul, “If anyone speaks in a tongue, two—or at the most three—should speak, one at a time, and someone must interpret. If there is no interpreter, the speaker should keep quiet in the church and speak to himself and God” (1 Corinthians 14:27–28). It would also be in accordance with 1 Corinthians 14:33, “For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.”

God can definitely give a person the gift of speaking in tongues to enable him or her to communicate with a person who speaks another language. The Holy Spirit is sovereign in the dispersion of the spiritual gifts (1 Corinthians 12:11). Just imagine how much more productive missionaries could be if they did not have to go to language school and were instantly able to speak to people in their own language. However, God does not seem to be doing this. Tongues does not seem to occur today in the manner it did in the New Testament, despite the fact that it would be immensely useful. The majority of believers who claim to practice the gift of speaking in tongues do not do so in agreement with the Scriptures mentioned above. These facts lead to the conclusion that the gift of tongues has ceased or is at least a rarity in God’s plan for the church today.

Author Anonymous & Unknown